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Thoughts on Love

2/14/2018

2 Comments

 
Well, happy Valentine's Day! And happy Wednesday! You know what that means, I'm going to ramble about love.

Well, I'm not going to ramble in a trying-to-be-poetic-and-cheesy way, more of an I'm-a-little-confused-about-the-way-we-talk-about-love way.

Because there's this weird disconnect. I mentioned this last year in a post of short, random thoughts. The way we talk about love is so weird. I mean:
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Like, watch "Once Upon a Time" and think about the way they talk about love: "True love's kiss can break any curse," and "True love isn't easy, but it must be fought for," and "It creates happiness," and it's "the most powerful magic of all, it can overcome anything." Etc. Etc. Etc.

And yet, "do you really want to give up (fill in the blank) for just a guy?" 

I understand a lot of the "I-don't-need-no-man" quotes are just meant to empower girls to be independent, and of course we should all learn to love ourselves first. It's also meant for us to protect ourselves, which does make sense. But getting too wrapped up in an I-don't-need-anyone mentality can mess with our heads.

Loving someone doesn't make us weaker. If you're in a relationship where you have to give up or alter drastic parts of who you are, you're in the wrong relationship, because that's not normal. You do have to learn to cooperate with someone, which sometimes means compromise, but in a good relationship, you'll be comfortable being 100% yourself around someone. That kind of relationship is so freeing. Yet there's all kinds of talk about falling in love being some kind of trap.

They say, "don't wait for a prince, save yourself." Okay, yeah, I can do that. Most of the time, anyway. But is there really so much shame in needing help once in a while? In the best relationships, you both save each other.

When I was in high school, I adopted the "I-don't-need-no-man" mentality, and considered myself "independent." Yeah. Sixteen years old, living with my parents at home and belonging to a huge group of loving friends at school. But no boyfriend, so, independent.

The truth is, we all need other people, and there's nothing wrong with that.

Anyway, I just wanted to put those thoughts out there for your pondering, wherever you may be on this Valentine's Day. Whether your single, in a relationship, in love with a fictional character, floating in space, or whatever else. Just remember these perspectives are extremes. Love isn't always a fairytale, but it won't make you "weak" either. It'll make you all kinds of things, but I said I wouldn't get poetic and cheesy, so we'll save that for another time. Or never. Alright. See you Monday!
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2 Comments
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9/30/2020 06:33:10 am

We share the same sentiment when it comes to believing that loving does not make us weaker. Many people are afraid of falling in love because they do not want to "give in" to their partner. But, that should not be the case at all because if someone truly loves you, you will never feel like you are giving in to them. Rather, it would feel natural that you want to spend the rest of your life with your partner. True love will not make you beg and sacrifice who you are because your partner will accept whatever it is that you have to offer - no matter how small or big that is.

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12/20/2022 07:54:40 am

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