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Wednesday Word: Growing Pains

5/30/2018

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Do you ever freak out a little inside because you think you’re too old for whatever personal crisis you’re going through? Like, “I shouldn’t be feeling this way because I’m an adult now! I’m 28 and should be past this!”
 
I was recently talking to a friend of mine about a mini personal crisis I was going through: social anxiety. I’m trying to do a new thing, and it’s scary. I’m comfortable behind my computer screen, or in various fantasy worlds. I love singing, and I thought attempting to be a better singer would be the toughest part of joining Sweet Adelines. But there’s the making new friends part, too. Everyone is wonderful, friendly, and welcoming, and yet I’m still nervous and awkward. It doesn’t really help that I’ve dreamed of being part of an acapella group since early high school, and have built this up in my mind.
 
But why am I so worried about how I’m coming across? Haven’t I had enough practice by now to know who I am, and how to interact with others? I’m a full grown adult! I should be past this!
 
So, my friend told me of her personal struggles, something similar she went through in high school. And you know what? She had those “I should be past this” thoughts too! At fifteen! I’m over here at 28 thinking this way.
 
Then I had a sort-of revelation that made me feel much better. What’s the alternative?
 
We both know someone significantly older than both of us, who thinks he’s always right because he’s older, and older = wiser. He can’t take direction, and you can forget about criticism. Arguing with him is a complete nightmare, because a disagreement is a personal attack. The kind of person who tells all kinds of stories about other people acting crazy around him, because he’s never thought to look inward and see the pattern: sometimes, things are your own fault. I'm sure we all know someone like this: someone so set in their ways it's unbearable.
 
This is what it looks like when a person stops growing. Age brings wisdom most of the time, sure. But how? A pesky little thing called self-reflection, where we look back and learn from shit. Why was I so anxious? What could I do differently? What did I say that I probably shouldn’t have, and what will I say next time instead? To be honest, self-reflection can really suck sometimes. But it’s so necessary it’s not even funny.
 
Just because you achieve a certain status, age, whatever, that doesn’t mean you’re the ultimate thing now and you’re done. That’s an awfully dangerous perspective to have. Start thinking that way, and you'll stop trying. Stop learning. Turn into a narcissistic grown-up baby who can’t take direction, criticism, or anything that doesn’t align with your personal worldview.

So, the next time you're having a personal crisis, and need to sit through some troubling thoughts, remember that you will grow from this. You will be better for it. Don't ignore what you're feeling or blame it on someone else. You're just another step closer to being the best you it's possible to be. I’m sure I’ll still have moments of crisis in my thirties, forties, and onward, but that's actually a good thing, because there's nothing more frustrating than an adult who can't learn from their mistakes. 

Maybe this "revelation" won't help you much when it comes to getting to the answers of your personal crisis, but I hope it'll make you feel better about the process. 

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The Mansion's Twins
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Dawn's Acapella
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The Mansion's Family
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Acapella Angels
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Stories of the Early Days
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Tuesday Tips: Getting it Back

5/29/2018

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Sorry to be absent again last week. I’m only just now starting to feel better.
 
So, since we’ve been out of the routine for a while, it seems only fitting to post a few tips for when you feel stuck, or when you’ve been out of it. How do you get it back?
 
I know I’ve said this before, but probably the number one tip to break you out of your dead spell is don’t believe in writer’s block. Don’t label your funky little phase as a debilitating condition. Writer’s block isn’t real. Ask yourself what you’re really feeling and what you really need.
 
Tired? It’s okay to take a break. Be patient with yourself. When you notice you feel like you’re banging your head against the wall, maybe it’s time to step away for a minute. Maybe you just need some food, sleep, and a shower. Or maybe you need a few days to clear your head and regain some inspiration. The danger here, of course, is that a few days becomes a week, becomes a few weeks, etc. Set a schedule for getting back your creative flow. It’s okay to take a week off, but make sure it’s only going to be a week. During that time, maybe you’re not focused on your own work. Maybe it’s time to absorb other people’s work. Read, read, read!
 
Perhaps you need some other forms of inspiration too. Draw. Sing. Dance. Try something new you’re not good at. This will help when it’s time to write again, so remember how it feels.
 
When the time comes to sit down in front of your pages again, take a deep breath. Read over what you already have. Give yourself permission to write crap. Remember when you did that new thing just for fun, even though you weren’t good at it? This is kind of like that, right?
 
Reward yourself for putting new words down. Seriously, even if you think they were all terrible and you don’t want to keep any of them. Even if you delete them all later, you still made progress. Reward yourself, because you could have just sat there thinking, “I’m no good, I have writer’s block, I’ll try tomorrow, or maybe next week…” Instead, you made the gears in your head turn again, which isn’t always easy. If they sit still too long, they start to rust. So go get yourself some ice cream!

Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Monday Music: Harvard-Radcliffe Veritones--The Re-arranger

5/28/2018

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I had never heard this song until I heard this group cover it, and that's when I fell in love with Morgan Mallory--I mean, that's when I feel in love with the Veritones.
Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Monday Music: Havana - Pentatonix

5/21/2018

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Pentatonix. Always the best. 
Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Wednesday Word: New Review of "Dawn's Acapella"

5/16/2018

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Sorry to skip yesterday, but I'm still sick. Anyway...

I don't normally blog new reviews every time I get them, I figure people would rather read whatever thoughts I come up with when they can see reviews on Amazon. However, this was a lovely review, and because Dawn's Acapella is always free, I thought I'd post to draw some attention to what (others have told me) is a sweet and inspiring short book.


5.0 out of 5 stars Massively inspirational, and fun to read!
By T. Ormiston-smith on April 30, 2018
So much teen fiction seems to be all the same nowadays that it was extra pleasing to me to find something so original. Realistic, relatable characters and believable situations combined with a truly great message to make a story that's both massively inspirational and fun to read. I came away from it more determined than ever to continue practising random acts of kindness.

Dawn's Acapella is always free on Smashwords! Click the link below to pick up this short and uplifting book!
Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Monday Music: Of Monsters And Men - Yellow Light

5/14/2018

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I don't know what to say about this lyric video, except that it's amazing and creepy. Yet somehow it's not (creepy), because the song is just so mellow and puts me to sleep. And I've been sick all freaking week (last week, I know it's Monday), so sleeping is what I'd like to do.
Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Wednesday Word: Still taking a week off, but...

5/9/2018

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I just wanted to brag a little bit. Last week was my first acapella competition, and we crushed it! We won second place in our division, and fifth place overall! It was a wonderful experience and I can't wait to have more like it.
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Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Tuesday Tips: Taking a week off!

5/8/2018

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Sometimes you need to take a break, so we're taking this week off. See you next Tuesday!
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Monday Music: See you next week!

5/7/2018

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This whole weekend was musical for me. I had my first acapella competition, leaving me with little time to think about writing. So, I'm taking this week off, but I'll be back next week with more music, tips, and random words from the land of Crossworlds!
Mansion's Twins
Mansion's Family
Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
Stories of the Early Days
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Wednesday Word: I'm Going on an Adventure!

5/2/2018

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This will be short and weird, because I'm distracted. 

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how even though our day to day lives are pretty much always the same, everything can change in just a moment. Like, that book I’m reading, “Quiet,” opens with a description of Rosa Parks on that bus. She set so much in motion and, well, changed the world that day. But think about it: she was just going home from work. She woke up that morning and it was literally any other day.

It's just crazy to me that everything can change in a moment, and the you six months from now could have a totally different life than the you today. I mean, it's a crazy thought, but also a very positive one.

I’m about to go off to my first ever acapella competition. Like, I'm leaving tomorrow. So I've got all sorts of crazy thoughts in my brain. There are lots of times we think we’ve lost an opportunity forever. Like, after I didn’t get into to my college acapella group the first six times. I sort of thought, oh well, better just accept this is never happening. Guess it just isn’t in the stars for me. Until February of this year, my boyfriend rather casually mentioned that there’s one nearby welcoming new members. And now I actually get to go do this thing I've been dreaming about for years. 

I know how I sound. “Inspirational” and obnoxious. But this is always one of those things I’ve actually found inspirational—at least, when it’s coming from my own brain and not a pretentious outsider. So I hope I don’t sound pretentious. It’s just cool that we have no idea what’s next, and everything really can change in a moment.

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The Mansion's Twins
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The Mansion's Family
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Dawn's Acapella
Acapella Angels
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Stories of the Early Days
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